The Druss Road Trip Day 6 – Scottsdale, AZ to Encinitas, CA

Ah, the last leg of the trip, the culmination, the end as it were.  A mercifully short leg of driving at 6 hours or so, we were of course thrilled to land on the West Coast.  On the way, we had some more laughs, especially when it came to the Border Patrol check points.  This day’s travels marked the fourth stop we experienced during the trip.  Here is how they went, in order, with the first being a couple days earlier.

  • Stern dudes with alert canine friend.  Stern dude A asks Dave his citizenship.  As we both agreed later, the answer was unclear.  Is it American?  Or United States?  Dave threw out United States and passed the test.  Turning his hard glare on me in the passenger seat and saying nothing, I stated “Same.”  WRONG answer. “Citizenship?” the man repeated, more sternly.  Stuttering, I spit out “United States” and whimpered.  Again saying nothing, he waved us on.  WHOA.
  • This check point was more laid back.  The 2 agents were visibly goofing around and laughing when we pulled up.
    • “Just the two of you clowns in there?”
    • “Yup”
    • “Have a good one”
  • This was easily our favorite.  With the real agents apparently on lunch break, there was a portly man with a crossing guard vest leaning against the security shack.  With a bored look and chin full of drool, he simply waved every car through, no questions asked. We felt much safer after this check point.
  • The last one of the day, as we got in California was a combination of 1 and 2.  Stern but not angry.  Though they had the mirrors to look beneath cars, just like in James Bond.  Neato..

With only a few hours left, we floored it through desert dunes, windy mountains and fields of produce. Dave also tuned in to the 90’s Hip Hop station on Pandora.  This was epic not only for the tracks being played but for how we must have appeared with the windows down, deliriously belting out lyrics.  We got to Tyler’s place about 4:30, just in time for him to wrap up work and go surfing.  The waves were fun and the ocean felt AMAZING.

For dinner, we met up with Dan and Kim at the Priority Public House in Leucadia.   The following was consumed:

  • Peanut Butter Milk Stout by Belching Beaver – best beer of all time
  • Rogue Dead Guy Ale
  • Omission Lager
  • Green Flash 30th Street Pale Ale
  • Scotch
    • How many of each of these liquids were gulped is unclear
  • Specialty Fries – parmesan, garlic and gorgonzola
  • Sliders Sampler – pulled pork, short rib and spicy sausage
  • PPH Burger – stuffed with jalepenos and chipotles, topped with cheese and house made pickles
  • Blackened Shrimp Po Boy
  • Pulled Pork
  • Mac n Cheese with Crab
  • Mac n Cheese with Bacon
  • And I’m missing something else here.

Also important is noting how awesome the people working there are. From the host to the waitress to the guy bringing out drinks, super friendly bunch.  You should go there.

Dave found a convenient short term place to stay via AirBnb and I shared a bed with Tyler.  The next morning, Tyler claimed his tummy was upset but wasn’t sure why.  I regaled his roommates with the above list – they laughed.  I also suggested they not enter his room for at least 3 days while it was aerated.

Tyler and I did some work on the following day, Friday, while Dave checked out a place to live, scraped bugs off the Audi and got some errands done.  We met for coffee and food and generally marveled, as usual, at the incredible atmosphere and lifestyle of SoCal.  That afternoon, all 3 of us went surfing.  The waves were AWESOME, and we were all fried by the end of the day.  I flew out the following morning and Dave is lining up a place to live.  Overall, a ROCKIN’ trip and with lots of fun had by all.  Wish Dave luck on his new beginnings, I know he’s gonna kill it!

Nova Scotia Surf Trip

My brother, Tyler, turned 30 this year. To celebrate, we were planning a surf trip to Nova Scotia from New Jersey. As such, I sent an email to the clowns that would be interested in such an adventure. Here is his self portrait for reference:


After reading what I had just written, I couldn’t stop laughing. Turns out my home skillet, Dan, got a charge out of it too. Because of his idea to set these creative juices out on the world wide web table of review (he’s a social media Jedi), here’s my first post ever (just posting it later than the those posts below). Let me know what you think.

Email Subject: Tyler is Turning 30 = Old Balls

Fellow Man Clowns,

As you may or not know, Tyler AKA Uncle Tyler AKA Ty Ty AKA Big Yellow AKA Captain Redbeard AKA Big Yellow First Night Diner is turning the ripe ol’ age of 30 next May. Old balls no doubt.

As such, I’m planning a trip to take the wee pickle dick on a surf trip to Nova Scotia. It’s been on his Viking Heritage To Do list for some time. The general plan is to head norf during Labor Day 2013. The goal is to take advantage of the holiday weekend for all and add on a couple days on both sides of the weekend. So, loosely (like my bowels) we would leave Wed AM and come back Tues AM. Figuring a day of travel each way, that would give us 5 full days of debauchery. And let’s be honest, nobody is doing shit at work before and after Labor Day.

So, save the date as we finalize the details and more importantly, let me know if you’re for sure in or out at this point. Here’s the scope of work:

  • Rent a house/condo/chicken coops at/on the beach
  • Rent a 15 passenger van
  • Mount surfboards on roof
  • Drive and be merry

Activity Schedule

  • Surf
  • Drink beer
  • Eat food that’s bad for you
  • Moon innocent bystanders on the road
  • Run around nude
  • General lewd drunken behavior
  • Attend house music raves
  • Terrorize local villages
  • Do cool stuff in Canada, at the beach in the early Fall

If I missed anyone on the email that should be here, please don’t forward it to them. Also, Phinney is on the invite list but doesn’t know how to use a computer so I’ll be sending him a letter via carrier pigeon. If he comes, we’ll put him in the outhouse so no one gets fondled in their sleep.

You’ve got a whole year to put this on your calendar and you should come cuz it’s gonna be completely absurd. But while you’re sitting there debating about attending, remember the immortal words of Captain O’Hagan from the Vermont State Super Troopers – “Indecision is a stinky cologne” (actually, it’s Desperation but who cares).

If you have any questions, feel free not to ask me. I will be in touch in a few months to got a solid head count so we can make necessary preparations.

Banana Fingers, Esq.