Decisions and The Waffle

WaffleI had a great conversation (as usual) with my sister, Caroline, the other day about making decisions and the waffling that goes along with them.  She made the excellent point that other folks probably deal with this so let’s find out.

Before we get started, I need to share these 2 hilarious definitions of waffle because as I began to write this article, I started to find the word funnier and funnier:

1890-95; (Scots, N England): to wave about, flutter, waver, be hesitant; probably waff + le

1695-1705; (N England): apparently waff to bark, yelp (imitative) + le

Which definition is better?  Really hard to say.  I sort of don’t know what the 2nd one even means.  But it has the word ‘yelp’ in it so I think it may be the victor.

Your friend invites you to a Tupperware party, all male hot tub event or a clothing optional Pagan bonfire celebration.  Unless it’s the Pagan bonfire, you flat out don’t want to go. Buuuut, not wanting to offend said friend, you waffle and digress and say things like:

  • “Hmmm, I’m not sure I can make it but we’ll see…” (and of course you include those dot dot dots for added waffling effect)
  • “I WANT to go but I THINK I MIGHT have something to do but I’m not REALLY sure?”

Insert any combination of question marks, added periods at the end of vague statements and extra ambiguous words.  This will qualify as waving about and fluttering or possibly being described as a waff per the definition above.  Do you want to be in this category?  No, you don’t.

Our sibling conversation began by acknowledging that we both have DEFINITELY been the waff in the past and agreed that it’s really LAME.  We then went on to describe the opposite of this approach – making a DECSION!  Here’s an example of the tremendous benefit of this action to an age old and INCREDIBLY absurd area of waffling.

Its lunch time at work and everyone needs to decide what they want to eat.  Now, we’ll skip the IMMENSELY difficult decision of choosing ham or turkey off the menu and back up a step to the ‘Which Menu’ conversation.

  • Coworker 1: Fellow clowns, where do you want to get lunch from today?
  • Coworker 2: I don’t know, how about that new pizza place?  But I don’t really care.
  • Coworker 3: I don’t care but I guess I could eat chicken.
  • Coworker 4: Hmmm, does anyone like meatball parms?  I sort of do but we don’t have to get them.

Notice the abundance of hesitance?  The ability to question if you’re even capable of making a decision? Can you relate?  Yes, you can.  Have you been coworker 1, 2, 3, or 4?  Yes, we all have.  So, the next time this mind bender of a situation presents itself, try this approach.

  • Coworker 1: Fellow clowns, where do you want to get lunch from today?
  • You: We’re going to The Golden Banana.  I’m having the chocolate dipped bananas supreme. Here’s the menu.  What do you want?

It works and it is unspeakably satisfying.

What other scenarios could you apply this to? The possibilities are endless.  So, let’s hear them.  Have you been the waffle?  Have you put your foot down to end the horror of lunch decisions?  I could go on for days with these types of funny situations but my fingers hurt and I hear a tiny, hairless baboon cackling and possibly getting her foot stuck in a crib railing so I’ll stop here.

photo credit: mariocutroneo via photopin cc

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